Australian Pokédex awesomeness!

A very talented Australian animation artist named Paul Robertson has turned his hand to making a uniquely Aussie Pokédex… and it’s just brilliant.  I imagine non-Australians might have some trouble interpreting some of these Pokémon creations – you’ll just have to trust us that it all makes sense!

Saving here for future reference, via @probzz on Twitter.

Kiwi Cop Humour

A North Island police station received this question from a resident through the feedback section of a local Police website:

“I would like to know how it is possible for police officers to continually harass people and get away with it?”

In response, a sergeant posted this reply:

First of all, let me tell you this … it’s not easy. In the Palmerston North and rural area we average one cop for every 505 people. Only about 60 per cent of those cops are on general duty (or what you might refer to as “general patrols”) where we do most of our harassing.

The rest are in non-harassing units that do not allow them contact with the day to day innocents. At any given moment, only one-fifth of the 60 per cent of general patrols are on duty and available for harassing people while the rest are off duty. So, roughly, one cop is responsible for harassing about 6000 residents.

When you toss in the commercial business and tourist locations that attract people from other areas, sometimes you have a situation where a single cop is responsible for harassing 15,000 or more people a day.

Now, your average eight-hour shift runs 28,800 seconds long. This gives a cop two-thirds of a second to harass a person, and then only another third of a second to drink a Massey iced coffee AND then find a new person to harass. This is not an easy task. To be honest, most cops are not up to the challenge day in and day out. It is just too tiring. What we do is utilise some tools to help us narrow down those people we can realistically harass.

PHONE: People will call us up and point out things that cause us to focus on a person for special harassment. “My neighbour is beating his wife” is a code phrase used often. This means we’ll come out and give somebody some special harassment. Another popular one is, “There’s a guy breaking into a house.” The harassment team is then put into action.

CARS: We have special cops assigned to harass people who drive. They like to harass the drivers of fast cars, cars with no insurance or drivers with no licences and the like. It’s lots of fun when you pick them out of traffic for nothing more obvious than running a red light. Sometimes you get to really heap the harassment on when you find they have drugs in the car, they are drunk, or have an outstanding warrant on file.

LAWS: When we don’t have phone or cars, and have nothing better to do, there are actually books that give us ideas for reasons to harass folks. They are called “statutes”. These include the Crimes Act, Summary Offences Act, Land Transport Act and a whole bunch of others… They spell out all sorts of things for which you can really mess with people. After you read the law, you can just drive around for a while until you find someone violating one of these listed offences and harass them. Just last week I saw a guy trying to steal a car. Well, the book says that’s not allowed. That meant I had permission to harass this guy.

It is a really cool system that we have set up, and it works pretty well. We seem to have a never-ending supply of folks to harass. And we get away with it. Why? Because, for the good citizens who pay the tab, we try to keep the streets safe for them, and they pay us to “harass” some people.

Next time you are in Palmerston North, give me the old “single finger wave”. That’s another one of those codes. It means, “You can harass me.” It’s one of our favourites.

hqdefault(via Derek Tidwell on FB)

Never pick a fight with the Grammar Nazis

  • I love the internet – You never know what you are going to find.  For example, I clicked through to a IFLScience link about some guy in a Mentos suit being dropped into a tank of diet soda to see what would happen.  There was a very short and disappointing .gif, but the internet trolls still provided plenty of entertainment.  Love it!
    haha true but still too short.

    thats what she said
    Avatar “That’s what she said.”
    Avatar  Spell-check guy, thank heavens you’re here. Oh wait did I spell that right? Thank-you spell-check guy, the world is a better place with your trustee spelling skills.
    Avatar  “trusty”
    Avatar  another spell-check guy. I’m guessing you a little thick when it comes to irony. Oh wait lets address this with Irony-guy.
    Avatar  You’re* let’s*
    Avatar  wait while I’m here, please let me run my essay in with you guys, this is awesome! always admire a free service, now while your carefully scrutinizing my every letter of every word that I’m typing, I just wanted to say thanks and I feel privileged.
    Avatar  Ah, screw it. “Wait, while I’m here, please let me run my essay by you guys. This is awesome! I always admire a free service. Now while you’re carefully scrutinizing my every letter, of every word that I’m typing, I just want to say, “thanks and I feel privileged”.”
    Avatar  You just comma spliced…
    Avatar  Actually he didn’t. It’s just a complex sentence.
    Avatar  Congrats u corrected grammar in your native language…something I was told Westerners were taught in gr. 5, yet is not important in a casual commentary. You and everyone who “liked” this need may need an education? You can then contribute something to a thread/convo. Maybe something funny on an intellectual level instead of a fifth grade level. (ps. Eng is my fourth language please feel free to correct professor…or is it “Professor” as spelling and grammar are more important than ideas in your world). These people who correct spelling and grammar rather than speaking on ideas need to expand themselves……….that is all…until you or someone else comment on my spelling/grammar so I can show my English class how English speakers respond to online errors in commentary. lol (that’s laugh-out-loud right? Or is there an error?
    Avatar  Actually, I just thought the corrections by others was humorous and decided to continue. Hence, the “screw it” comment. However, since you brought it up, when I speak or write German or Russian, I actually appreciate those who correct me so I can be better at speaking or writing the languages I am trying to use. I would not take offense as much as use it as a learning tool. And I would also add that language is important even in commentary as you are still trying to be understood in any language you use. Maybe I am correcting because the act of correcting solidifies my ability to speak the language as English is a difficult one and one others who are native speakers still have problems with well into adulthood. Furthermore, I had no indication that he is not a native speaker and was not doing it to ridicule, so your comments and attempts at insults have no place in a reply to me. Having said all of that, bite me.
    Avatar  “Having said all of that, bite me” You sire, you winneth the internet.
    Avatar  Are you calling him a king, or are you calling him a man in a respectful manner?Avatar  I don’t care what these people are saying. Your comments were the delight of my day. Thank you sir.
    Avatar  English to me is the 3rd out of 5 languages and, indeed, i highly appreciate being corrected as it helps me learn and further develop my skills. Also, I do mind it when people cannot use their own language properly, even in an informal comment/ conversation. As for your last sentence, I am now officially a fan of yours <bows>.Avatar  “Actually, I just thought the corrections by others were* humorous..”
    Avatar  Here’s some additional help Patrick “and” or “but” are conjunctions, used to to connect clauses and not to start them (no problem starting with a conjunction properly). Let’s make all threads an English lessons :). Please correct me. I’m here to learn how to speak/write not read an article about mentos/coke explosions. Avatar  Sure, I’ll give it a go! “Here’s some additional help, Patrick.” Your sentence was ended. “And” should have been the start of a new sentence.
    Avatar  You don’t start a sentence with “and”…
    Avatar  Actually in that sentence, you most definitely do:  “Here’s some additional help Patrick. ‘And’ or ‘but’ are conjunctions, used to to connect clauses and not to start them.”  Think about it. The “and” in quotes is not functioning as a conjunction. Avatar  Actually, in this particular case you do start it with an “and. It should go: “And” and “But” are conjuntions, bla, bla, bla… You are providing information about the language. In this particular case, “and” is not being used as a conjuntion… It’s being merely used as an example, it must be between “” or in italic…. 🙂
    Avatar  I’d have gone with a colon, personally.
    Avatar  wow you’re english is so goode. Golde star! (You stfil didnt use “and” proparly no mater how hard you try to deflecte)
    Avatar  (A different Patrick) You can actually begin clauses with ‘and’ or ‘but’ however it’s advisable to practise it sparingly.
    Avatar  oooooohhhh, I see you, felt these English speakers needed “help”…….. it was a big misunderstanding. You wern’t trying to be smart. You had me until that last comment. smh
    Avatar  Don’t we all need help at times? The truth of the matter was in the first sentence. I thought it all very funny. The rest was just points for him to ponder. I don’t dismiss anyone’s point because of grammar but if you are going to write, why not try to be “better”.
    Avatar  ^ *were humorous” I hope the correction helps you “become better at speaking or writing” as you suggested.
    Avatar  See? You make my point. That’s a good catch on your part.
    Avatar  Since you’re so concerned about meaning, the meanings of the word “your” and contraction “you’re” are ENTIRELY DIFFERENT.
    Avatar  Yep, that’s true. It’s very important to know the difference between knowing YOUR sh*t and knowing YOU’RE sh*t. 😉