Row ya bastards! Row!

Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone, and another one gone
Another one bites the dust
Hey, I’m gonna get you too
Another one bites the dust

And while yet another of my colleagues resigns today… the Management keeps feeding us!  Yep that’s right – wine and cheese this afternoon…  Good lord – if one more person hands in their resignation, I reckons they’ll be shouting the whole team dinner at Two Small Rooms before we know it!

What the hell is going on here?  That’s like six people all heading out of the place now.. which no doubt is going to have a traumatizing flow on effect to those of us who are left behind…. fewer peoples, same amount of work.  And even some newbies turning up wont be of much help for weeks as we end up spending time training them. 

What on earth have I gotten myself into here… think I’m gonna start looking for a nice cushy govt job with flexi-time … like right about next week.  :S

Stay of Care Bear Execution.

Since my Manager resigned, there’s been a definite feel of “well-what-the-fuck-are-we-all-doing-here-anyway” around the office, which, while not entirely unpleasant or unexpected, has seen the motivation around the place plummet like a lead balloon. 

As a point of interest, which has nothing to do with what I was going to write – Management seems to think they can fix the morale issues with food!!  Go figure.  We’re a team of 11 women and 1 guy, and since the Customer Service Manager decided to cut and run last week, there’s been trays and trays of food turning up in our office just for the 12 of us – and for ‘no particular reason’.  Today’s effort of a massive tray of various cakes, slices and danish was pretty impressive – but I think they’ve got their target audience wrong.  A tray of yummies might stop the non-cooking, non-baking IT geeks from expressing how desperately unhappy they are, but my group are predominantly Mommies or Mommies-in- waiting…. and we already know how to placate discontent with food!  🙂   If Management  seriously thinks bringing a token tray of carefully selected muffins into the place will honestly distract people from the fact that we’re dreadfully understaffed, horribly overworked and  hideously demoralized … then I think they’re seriously deluded.

But as you all know, I’m ever the Eternal Optimist (hey, it’s my blog I can write what I want!) and have found an upside – the Great Customer Service  Care Bear disaster… has been shelved!!! 

Yay for silver linings 🙂

The worlds need more of these…

Yale flicked me a link to this picture this morning, and even though I’m kinda sick… you know the drill – painful thumping head that feels like it’s stuffed full of cotton wool, husky phone sex voice to die for, disgusting harking noises that should never emit from small blonde people, and aching tired body from lack of sleep, though thank God  the whole sensation of swallowing razor blades abated with the help of modern medicine…. damn but I get off the point quickly.  :S

He flicked me a link to this picture and even though I’m feeling like a wrung out dish rag, I laughed my throaty little stuffed up head off … and then i couldn’t breathe so good… but it was worth it  🙂


Uncommon generosity

I remember years ago,  back when I was about 19 and dating A1, we went down to visit one of his Uncles – of which there were several – and while A1 and his Uncle were bitching about some football team, I spent some time poking around in his work shed.  Uncle Mike was a French polisher by trade and his bloke cave was messy as could be – full of half completed pieces of furniture, tins of paints,  dangerous looking tools and general creative disarray. The place was always stuffed to the beams with pieces of timber… some hastily discarded as rubbish… and others carefully stored for future projects.  I remember, quite vividly, the strong smells of the wood and the shellac and varnishes he used. … and I also remember the crunchy woodchips and the spongy sawdust underfoot, as I poked through the shed, opening drawers and looking in stuff I probably shouldn’t have been pfaffing with.

Anyway, when the football nonsense was over, I spent a few hours talking with Uncle Mike about what he does, and he showed me how to turn wood, and told me all about the different projects he was working on, some of them restorations, and some of them he was building something new from scratch.  He showed me lots of different timbers, and I remember falling in love with the colours of the Jarrah and the beautiful fine grain of the Tasmanian oak and the gorgeous smell of the Huon pine.  (God if you could truly bottle the smell of Huon pine and sell it as a men’s aftershave or even as a incense or something… I reckon you’d make a fortune.)   Anyway, I had a lovely afternoon with Mike in his shed, and then pretty much forgot all about it.

Until about a year later, when unexpectedly, he turned up with a gift for me… a beautiful hand crafted glory box made out of solid Tasmanian oak, and French polished to a beautiful sheen.  It was an overwhelming gift… unexpected and generous beyond measure.  I couldn’t believe that Mike had gone to all that trouble on my account, and I was truly overwhelmed by it.  He waved it away and said it had cost little but his time… but I can’t tell you how much it meant to me… how much that box still means to me.  It is probably one of the most treasured things I own, and most certainly, receiving it, is one of my fondest memories.

And now I have another friend, who is sharing their time and talents with me in an unexpected and uncommonly generous way…… and I want to thank him… and I don’t know how to  ….   yet.    🙂

Sound advice….

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
2. Don’t worry about what people think, they don’t do it very often.
3. Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
5. If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you’ve never tried before.
6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.
12. A conscience is what hurts when all of your other parts feel SO good.
13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
14. Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
15. No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes.
16. A balanced diet is chocolate in each hand.
17. Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist change places.
18. Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
19. Junk is something you’ve kept for years and throw away 3 weeks before you need it.
20. There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
21. Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
22. By the time you can make ends meet, they move the ends.
23. Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
24. Someone who thinks logically provides a nice contrast to the real world.
25. It ain’t the jeans that make your butt look fat.
26. If you had to identify, in 1 word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, & never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings.”
27. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
28. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
29. You should not confuse your career with your life.
30. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
31. Never lick a steak knife.
32. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
33. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
34. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.
35. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
36. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)
37. Your friends love you anyway.
38. Don’t argue with an idiot; people watching may not be able to tell the difference.
39. Never pat a burning dog.
40. Don’t operate power tools naked.
good sound advice