Ow Ow Ow! Fuckity Ow!

I NEVER asked for the anal probe!
I never ASKED for the anal probe!
I never asked FOR the anal probe!
I never asked for the ANAL PROBE!  Goddammit!!!

And yet… I feel rather like I just got totally reamed complete with sandy lube on this one.

My little dawg Caesar had a tick on him last night.  I discovered it about 11pm so it was off to the all night vet.  Now I know very little about animal and puppy medicine and even less about paralysis ticks so it was one of those situations where you just have to trust in the guy in the costume and take their advice. Last night he told us that we seemed to have found the tick fairly early and his symptoms weren’t too far gone (i noticed he was kinda coughing and he was walking like he was drunk or something – I was all ready to accuse Angus of getting Caesar stoned but remembered that Angus doesn’t go to the State School anymore so is no longer likely to get easy access to serious narcotics or hallucinogenic substances.

Anyway one mercy dash to the vet clinic later and 18 hours of puppy admitted for ‘treatment’ (wasn’t overly defined at the time) and I get the bill… for

FIVE HUNDRED AND TWENTY DOLLARS

and how many cents….  mumble fuck…  mumble fuck… pfaff with papers … here it is

FIVE HUNDRED AND TWENTY DOLLARS AND FORTY ONE CENTS!!!!  

Holy shit I could have bought a new one with that much money!  (Yeah i know – bad joke)

So it makes me think you know… I love my dog but… at what point does affection for your mutt overcome your need to oh, I don’t know buy groceries and maybe pay the rates or something?  
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Holy snappin’ duck shit!!! What the hell was that?!?!

My house which is a the bottom of my street backs onto the Gateway Motorway (one of the main bypass roads for the city).  As anyone who has come to visit us here knows that the traffic noise is really rather loud and off putting outside.  Normally you can’t hear much of it inside the house as the roof is insulated well and we don’t have any widows on the west side of the house that faces the highway.  At the moment they’re expanding the road out there which means they’re also in the middle of putting up massive new noise barriers which will probably make it nice and quiet in the yard too.

As per usual I’m getting off the point :S  Every now and then you’ll hear a truck tyre blow and it sounds like a gun shot or something or you occasionally hear the squeal of brakes and brace yourself for the crash which more often than not never happens.  You can often hear idiot truckies on their jake brake cos they’re lazy fuckers.  Anyway yesterday afternoon we were hanging about in the lounge room when we heard a god almighty crash out the back… probably the worst sound I’ve ever heard from out the back.  Seeing that it was nearly time to go get the Small Child from school we decided to head off a little early so we’d have a few minutes to have a sticky beak from the overpass to see what had happened.

And were greeted by this –

It was only about 150m from my house.  So it happened around 2.40pm which of course then meant the traffic was shot until well after the peak hour.  I drove past on our way back from dinner out last night and at 8.45pm they still hadn’t even started the vehicle recovery.  I can’t believe that both the truck driver and the driver of the little mashed 4WD walked away from this mess.


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Grace invaders!


Amok! Amok! Amok! Amok!!  Someone please remind me to ask them over the day BEFORE the cleaner comes, not the day AFTER.


Monday’s child is fair of face

Tuesday’s child is full of grace
Wednesday’s child is full of woe
Thursday’s child has far to go
Friday’s child is loving and giving
Saturday’s child works hard for a living
But the child that is born on the Sabbath day
is Blithe and  bonny, good and gay…. apparently!

I had a houseful of children this morning and most of the were Tuesday children….. or so their mothers assured me.

‘Full of grace’ my arse!  One knocked a bottle of wine off the wine rack (luckily it did not smash), another spent most of her visit jumping on the couch (despite several entreaties on my part for her to refrain from doing so), another spent several minutes smacking my coffee table about with a Transformer (though I know not what offense the coffee table may have offered) and yet another, God bless her cotton socks, upchucked on my Turkish rug!  The same Turkish rug her brother peed on when last they came to visit!
askforhelp
Come to think of it… I’m a Tuesday too… obviously came a day early!   :S
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Where there’s smoke….

…. there’s filthy smokers.

I can smell smoke in my house today.  Could be Jack who had a cigarette after he finished work right outside the open front door – but that was several hours ago.  Could be the neighbours sitting under their patio – but I don’t think there’s any breeze coming that way.  Could be the counsel workers out the back – but I can’t see anyone back there at the moment.  Could be just the fact that I’ve got some windows open for the first time in months since it’s finally cool enough to have the AC turned off.

Whatever.  I think my sensitivity to cigarette smoke has actually increased since all the anti-smoking laws came into effect in Qld – no smoking in restaurants, bars, clubs, shopping centres and they even have to be 4 meters away from any entrance to a public building so we’ve been less and less exposed to it now.  I can’t stand it.  I’ve got no idea how I smoked for nearly 10 years myself and now I find it so abhorrent that the teeniest whiff of cigarette smoke in my house has me wanting to drown the air with vanilla incense or something.


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