Idle hands….

Saw the cute little blogthings that Avitable had added in his blog analysis. 1500 entries is pretty impressive. 31,000 odd comments since starting blogging in 2004 is really impressive…. or is it? I don’t know. I know the commenting system is there to allow peopl to have feedback on what you’re spewing out onto an unsuspecting public – but I just don’t know if I really like the idea of hundreds or maybe even thousands of unknown people reading my crap… oh and crap it truly is. Maybe it’s better to be sitting here thinking that hardly anyone is reading this rubbish and it’s this that keeps us honest 🙂 Anyway … cute blogthings are alway in the purvey of the truly bored so I swiped some of them… as you do.

s320x240

Results
We guess http://boryssnorc.livejournal.com/ is written by a man
(53%), however it’s quite gender neutral.

Ummm… not so much. According to my birth certificate (which may or may not be reliable given that I was born in St Vinnie’s Hospital in Toowoomba) I am indeed female. Though it is an understandable mistake as I have oft been told that many of my views are less than typically feminine (probably something to do with not having proper girly swot hormones).

s320x240

Rated: R

Okay so this one is probably a little skewiff considering my rant earlier in the week about the wanker who threw an egg at the windscreen contained some rather choice words that I hardly ever use unelss extremely aggravated (or drunk). Probably the content here isn’t suitable for minors but that’s likely more due to accident than by design.

s320x240

ESTP – The Doers

The active and play-ful type. They are especially attuned to people and things around them and often full of energy, talking, joking and engaging in physical out-door activities. The Doers are happiest with action-filled work which craves their full attention and focus. They might be very impulsive and more keen on starting something new than following it through. They might have a problem with sitting still or remaining inactive for any period of time.

Analysis

This show what parts of the brain that were dominant during writing.

brain

Ummm… I don’t know about this. I look pessimistic and maybe spiritually bankrupt…. oh no wait. That sounds like me some days.

How much is your blog worth?

 

My blog is worth $0.00.

LOL – no surprises there. I’ve known for some time there’s nothing of any inherent value to be found in this damn thing 🙂  I think if it had any real value/worth you’d feel a certain expectation to ‘perform’ in some way.  It’d probably suck all the fun out of having an outlet for complete and utter nonsense.  Last one –

151032_320Readability score: Postgrad

Okay I might have screwed with that one a little bit   🙂  But only cos I needed to build my self esteem up after being told my blog was worthless 😐

Are we there yet?

"Ahem.  Welcome to Brisbane where the outside temperature is 25 degrees and the local time is just going on 7 minutes past six.  Please remain seated until the Captain switches off the seatbelt signs overhead and the plane has come to a complete stop.  Please also be aware that your overhead luggage may have moved during our flight and we ask that you take care when opening the overhead lockers.

We will be disembarking via the front doors only this afternoon so please follow all directions of the ground staff and remain within the yellow lined areas.  The plane will be refueling durring our disembarkation so we request that all mobile phones remain switched off until you are safely inside the terminal building.  Let me also remind you that smoking is not permitted i this area and there is no smoking allowed on the tarmac or in the terminal building.

As many of you are aware… Queensland has strict quarrantine regulations regarding the importation of any fruit, vegetable, plant or seed items.  These regulations have recently been updated to include products made from cocoa so please hand any products containing chocolate to the flight crew as you disembark.

It has been your pleasure having us on board your flight this afternoon and we wish you a safe trip home and/or a safe onward journey.  Thank you for choosing to fly Virgin Blue and we hope to see you again soon."
.

Driving along in my automobile

I was being driven home tonight after a pleasant couple of hours having a cuppa with some friends… and we were coming through a fairly deserted area of road with no traffic to speak of and some fucking little brainless cunts (yes… pissed off and wound up enough for the seaword… probably only it’s second or third appearance in this whole journal) threw something at the windscreen of our car.

We were just driving along, I don’t recall if anyone was coming in the opposite direction or not and we heard a really loud crack noise (which was so loud that I initialy thought it was possibly a gun shot.  I looked up (I was tapping a calendar reminder into my iPhone at the time) and saw a massive splat of goo all over the windscreen.  Obviously not a gunshot (thank fuck) , too much goo to be bug (or one helluva fucking big bug), definitely not a bird (no blood and guts)… just goo.

We pull over (I’m sitting in the car ready to call the police if it was some sort of ploy to get the vehicle to stop… yeah my mind always immedately jumps to the worst conclusions) and we were trying to figure out what it was when sir_phil  finds a bit of egg shell near the wipers.  Some bored and obviously IQ defficient  individual/s threw a raw and possibly rotten (judging by the aroma) egg at our vehicle’s windscreen while we were travelling along at highway speed.

I mean honestly… what the fuck?  Where is the entertainment value in this?  If Sir Phil had reacted badly to the noise and sudden visual impariment of egg splattered all over the windscreen… we could very nearly have ended up in a fucking ditch or rammed into a road sign or something.  What sort of moron does shit like this for fun?

I am so totally over being freaked out in cars.  I’ve spent the last year over reacting to every little slight irregularity on the road… flinching when  anyone feels like they are too close… hypersensitive to feeling like I’m being tailgated… really uncomfortable when someone else is in control of the vehicle and I sit there biting my tongue trying not to tell them to ‘slow down’ or ‘dont follow too close please’, working really hard trying to either not pay attention or pretend I’ve got my shit together and am not bothered.  But I am really really tired of freaking out on the road over every little thing…. and then some fuckwit throws an egg at us…

I am starting to feel like I am cursed.  Like I was supposed to have gotten dead back in 1991 (in my 2nd accident) and someone’s been trying to get it finished ever since.  I honestly think I am destined to die in an automotive incident and for ages now have been just totally waiting for the hammer to fall.

PS –  I need nooo shew-hoo-hews   🙁
.

Free lessons available… phone ahead to avoid disappointment.

I have a question….

Why is gift wrapping so hard?  For men that is.

I don’t think I’ve ever met a man who was confident and adept at the whole wrapping presents thing.  Most men I know tend to leave all the gift wrapping to their significant female others.  I know in our household I’ve been pretty much responsibile for the wrapping of presents for every occasion (christmas, birthdays, engagements, weddings what have you) for the last ten years –  for his family and mine.

And I’m not talking about a bunch of bricklayers here who might be a bit clumsy in the fine motor skills department.  My Dad who was a mechanical engineer and was known for his fastidious and meticulous nature hated wrapping presents and would usually give any wrapping he required to one of his three daughters to deal with – which was usually only one gift for my Mum seeing that he had always fobbed all the gift purchasing duties off to her too over the years.

In fact the only time I remember being impressed by a man’s wrapping skills is when Surly wrapped up a stuffed cat for the Small Child on his third birthday.  It had taken him 45 minutes to do it and he was obviously trying to be silly.  BigSal did admit he got rather frustrated with it eventually but once committed to the course of action, he had to see it through 🙂

cat shaped gift wrap

Anyway, today I watched while sir_phil struggled with his Christmas wrapping.  He was cursing and getting annoyed but he persevered because he knew his girlfriend would appreciate his efforts.  And there was me watching his complete (but very sweet) incompetence, being alternately amused and then visibily twitching as he use more paper than necessary and some of the most ‘interesting’ of wrapping techniques I’ve ever seen.  It was all I could do not to say ‘Oh for goodness sake move over and let me do it !!!’

I don’t understand why such a simple thing can be so difficult for some.  I don’t remember ever being taught how to wrap gifts… it’s just something you pick up by osmosis somehow.  I wonder if it’s a failing of just Aussie men? Are their foreign counterparts more adept and less stressed over the present wrapping process?  Or is it just the Y chromosone in general that can’t comfortalby exist with ‘the wrapping gene’   🙂
.