No Undie Monday
This is a time honoured tradition most established amongst uni students, hippie swamp rat types and mid-level public servants who spend their weekends trying to get laid. If memory serves this common phenomena results from an inability to successful complete all one’s laundry duties on the weekend.
Tits Out Tuesday
This particular expression is a colourful colloquialism resulting from an office full of women spending their Tuesdays trying to out do each other in wearing blouses whose primary design function is to display as much cleavage as humanly possible whilst maintaning some pretense of an attempt to adhere to the office’s Code of Conduct policies. This particular expression has also spawned the concept of the "Tuesday Top". (EG – ‘Holy fuck! Check that out… it must be Tuesday!")
Welfare Wednesday
Welfare Wednesday was an expression used to explain the particularly long queues that would appear outside Commonwealth Banks on Wednesday mornings as all the pensioners lined up with their savings account PASSBOOKS to go into the tellers and withdraw their pension money. This expression has diminished in use somewhat over the years with the introduction of ATMs and the change in process that has seen Centrelink take to giving out benefits on every day of the week – a move which was no doubt largely precipitated by the major banks compaining of being over run with the old bitties every Wednesday.
Man Love Thursday
A geographically local expression used to describe the public displays of affection between men seen in various extremely conservative societies where physical affection between a man and a women is frowned upon. For example – in Pakistan one never sees a physical expression of fondness or affection between a man and a women… but it is common to see men lounging close together, sitting on one another’s laps, walking hand in hand with other men or greeting one another with kisses.
and now we have –
Fatality Free Friday
This is a new one to enter the vocabulary and this author had never heard of it until this year where it was plastered on billboards all over town. The concept being that people will on this day the 22nd of May 2009 take a pledge to ‘drive more safely today’ than on any other day to promote driver awareness and road safety…. but really, let’s be honest… they’re just tempting fate here! Fatality Free Friday my arse!!! What sort of public relations/advertising miscreant trying to justify their exhorbitant salary came up with this crap!?!?!
Needless to say that Fatality Free Friday has this little black duck holed up in her house for the entire duration as I flatly refuse to drive anywhere today. For if anyone is going to end up a road fatality statistic on ‘Fatality Free Friday’… it’ll be Borys. For She is one who has already suffered through four hideous MVAs (none of which was she at fault). It is also She who seems to constantly run afoul of BrisVegas’ worst drivers on a regular basis. She is also still prone to being hypervigilant on the road and on occasion still feels Herself fighting rising panic when encountering the overwheming bulk number of chicken fuckin’ morons out there who shouldn’t even have a license. I mean ferfucksake! Even the Parking Fairy abandoned her many years ago!!!
So… Borys and Cars do not mix…. and especially not on ‘FATALITY FUCKING FREE FRIDAY’!!!
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