My sister invited herself over today for lunch today, which would hardly be worth commenting on, except that she bought lunch with her, which is something she just doesn’t do. So I knew she had something to tell me. And surprise, surprise, she’s up the duff.
I knew that was coming, though wasn’t expecting it so soon. I managed to hold it together while she was there, and made all the appropriate “I’m happy for you” noises that people expect. I was fine until I had to tell Hubby about it, at which point he looked right through me and I fell to pathetic little bits. The truth is I am not happy for her, which is something that I feel guilty about, because I should be pleased for her. But I am just not. Mostly, I am just jealous as all shit. Jealous, angry, frustrated, and increasingly bitter about my own situation.
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