English mother f#@ker! Do you speak it?

It seems Oxford University has compiled a list of the top ten most irritating phrases.  An interesting concept and one I thought would spectacularly depict the rapid bastardization the English language faces with the onset of SMS brevity and gaming and internet jargon.  The top ten most irritating expressions according to Oxford University are as follows –

The Oxford University’s top ten most irritating phrases:
1 – At the end of the day
2 – Fairly unique
3 – I personally
4 – At this moment in time
5 – With all due respect
6 – Absolutely
7 – It’s a nightmare
8 – Shouldn’t of
9 – 24/7
10 – It’s not rocket science

Some of these annoy me too…. especially the “shouldn’t of” instead of “shouldn’t have”.  I have a tendancy to infrequently say ‘absolutely’ (even when something is not, in fact, absolute), but it is one that annoys the hell out of me if I’m conversing with someone who says it for every affirmative they wish to utter.  Nothing can be “fairly unique” it either is or it isn’t.  “With all due respect…” is just a polite way of saying “grab your ankles, because here comes my size three boot without the courtesy of lube” so that one I can live with.  But the rest of them are fairly innocuous tautologies or oxymorons.

Naturally being far more wordy in my thoughts, speech and writing habits than is reasonably required for any given situation, I have my own list of idioms that annoy the living crap out of me…

borysSNORC’s list of irksome abuses of the vernacular:

1 – Bunches – get some fucking collective nouns people!
2 – LOL – when someone actually says ‘LOL’ instead of just laughing.
3 – Supposably – for ‘supposedly’… didn’t quite finish 8th Grade did we?
4 – Any gangsta, homie or youth rap idiom… can’t understand a word of it.
5 – Gunna – when did we go from ‘going to’ do things to ‘gunna’ do them?
6 – Like – it’s like, totally like, showing that you can’t like, speak like, English!?
7 – Yoda speech – ‘Yeess. Speak poorly you will’… Kill me now.
8 – You know – oddly, when employed by ESL speakers it gives the appearance fluency.
9 – I can haz – LOLcattian syntax really raises the hackles
10 – Vagina or penis euphemisms – wee wees, doodles, pee pees, winkles, coochies, hoo-hoos… at some point, should we not grant our children more intelligence that this, and call genitals by their anatomically correct terms?

That about covers it, though I’m sure if I sat here long enough or kept coming back it, I’d have a list as long as your arm.

Tell me what you think