I was up late last night, and didn’t get to sleep until after 1am. Couldn’t read anything as I couldn’t think straight and was feeling more than a bit lonely and depressed… and thought I’d like to think it’s got nothing to do with it, I’m sure it is in small part due to the Shakespeare overdose of late. I slept so poorly last night, I think I spent more time awake than asleep.
At one point, being 2:47am precisely, I woke up thinking I heard something outside my bedroom window. Now normally this would cause me to get up and peer out from behind the curtains into the darkness in order to try and ascertain where the curious noise had come from. Or at least that would have been my usual manner of response to untoward things that go bump in the night. But that was before…. before the Valium that is. Last night, upon hearing strange and unidentifiable noises, I lay in bed for a good five minutes feeling heavy limbed and trying to shake my head to allow my eyes to function through a drugged haze. The attempt to regain control of my limbs and mental faculties proved positively futile and I eventually abandoned the effort to get out of bed to investigate what was possibly a potential intruder (either that or it was the tear away teenager from next door using my patio to have deep and meaningful conversations (read God awful rows) with her balding middle aged boyfriend again.
It was the weirdest feeling I think I’ve ever encountered… I used to be instantly awake when roused in the night to the point I’d have difficulties going back to sleep, but not so on this occasion. I felt like I couldn’t get up or see anything clearly even though I wanted to. I found myself awake again at 3:30am and again at 4:10am. I also clearly remember the Small Child waking me at 6:50am asking if he could watch the latest Harry Potter movie (one we had deemed too dark for a six year old) and I blithely gave my permission for same in a half asleep and wholly drugged stupor. I’ve woken again at 7:40am with the Small Child demanding an explanation of who the evil man with no nose is. And then I dozed in and out until 8ish when I realized that I was sleeping in and my Small Child was up watching something with concepts inappropriate for his young developing mind.
So I dragged myself out of bed… several times actually as I kept on crawling back in. And now I’m tired… de do do do. Tired of playing ze game… de do do do… aint it a cwying shame… I’m sooo tired!