I went for a massage yesterday… cos that is what you do when you back has been screaming at you in technicolour for a few weeks.
Stupid move. 😐
I felt great when I walked out of there, and felt pretty good while having lunch with BigSal, even felt fine while I was out Op Shopping for a frock for HdM to wear to the Dirty 30s party. Got home, hung out with the little guy for a bit, fixed a bit of dinner, went out to see the Queen with BigSal and CookieMistress, had coffees across the street at the Citrus Cafe, came home, went to sleep……. and then ….. woke up this morning feeling like I’ve been beaten to a pulp by someone with small pointy hands in my sleep! 😐
My back literally feels bruised, and if I could turn my neck well enough to have a look in the mirror I fully expect to be all black and blue! Normally the pain just hangs about in the joints and the muscles, but at the moment, OMG, I feel positively battered….. I mean my back hurts if I so much as lean against my chair back!
Most people don’t understand what it’s like….. waking up in pain…… trying to go about your day in pain…. doing your best to ignore the pain…… and then trying to get to sleep at night and the pain is still there. I can’t remember the last time I woke up feeling refreshed…. in fact I’d like to wake up just one morning and the first thing I’m aware of is something other than the fact that my back is still hurting.
I used to take a ridiculous amount of drugs every day to try and stay on top of it all, but I hated going about feeling dopey. Analgesics for the pain, sedatives for the insomnia, anti-inflamatorys for the muscle spasm, anti-depressants to combat the depressant natures of the analgesics and the sedatives! Not to mention the non-prescription stuff I used to chuck down on top of all that when it seemed to be not working so good. I was a veritable walking pharmacy and popping so many pills I rattled. The result of all this, left me feeling more than a little dazed half the time. So after getting off all that shite, I’m certainly more alert, but comes with a downside… I’m often short tempered, ill humored and have little or no patience.
So today, feeling well and truly stirred up and not in the best of moods, I think it’s a perfect day to put my best foot forward and find that perfect job!
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