Clomid gives me all sorts of fun. The most common side effect I get from being on Clomid is a strange visual aberration that alters my visual perception of the outlines of objects. Things entering my field of vision appear to have multiple outlines, particularly under artificial lighting conditions which is most disconcerting I can tell you. I have been calling it my ‘Mouse Tails’ for years, as it is exactly like when you have the Mouse Tails on. For Windows, Go to Start Menu > Control Panel > Printers and Other Hardware > Mouse/Pointer Options > Tick Display Pointer Trails > Select Long > Click OK. Now imagine that everything in your field of vision has things like that following after it when it moves in front of you! You can see why I dont drive at night when I am on Clomid. My friends like to make fun of me when ‘my Mouse Tails are on’, by waving their hands in front of my face a lot. Sometimes it is so bad, I get vertigo or feel like I am going to be sick from the overload of non-image forming visual anomolies. When I told Dr IVF about it, he laughed and says ‘You normally have to pay a lot more for your drugs to get that sort of effect!’ Which is cute, but not particularly helpful.
Ovidrel or Profasi shots make me a little quiet or easily tearful for about a day or so. A little melancholy really and prone to popping on soppy chick flicks if I have some time to myself. Oh, and the progesterone often causes me to get a pimple or two on my chin which I hate, because I am very fair, and they stand out dogs’ balls! Could be worse, not particularly inconvenient and certainlly not as problematic as being unable to decide where the edge of a table is!
Dr IVF, always asks me about my mood when I am taking Progynova? Not sure why? I reckon I could take that stuff forever and it doesn’t knock me around at all. Obviously lots of women must report being twitchy on Progynova or he wouldn’t ask about it, but it doesn’t bother me much at all and I have never noticed any side effects at all.
But Puregon is a different matter entirely. For the last four days, I have been injecting myself with Puregon which is a follicle stimulating hormone derived from the pickled ovaries of geneticaly engineered chinese hamsters or some such shit. By day two I feel like I want to go postal at anyone who comes near me…… for any reason at all…. God dammit, I will find a reason….. or even better, for no reason at all! I feel like a viper sitting in a corner, watching the world through narrowed eyes, thinking, “go on…. poke me…. I dare ya!” I spend all day fighting the overwhelming urge to lose it with my gorgeous little boy for the most insignificant of infractions, like forgetting to flush the toilet/leaving a dirty plate on the table or for not putting his toys away. And if you think I have the energy to keep it reigned in by the time Hubby walks through the door, you are kidding yourself. It is absolutely open season on husbands during Puregon weeks. When I am on Puregon, he could come home from work at night with two dozen tulips, Verve Cliquot champage, diamond jewellery and tickets to Bora Bora, and my response would be “GET YOUR FUCKIN’ FILTHY SHOES OFF MY CARPET!!!!” I have been growling around the house all week, finding little things that just piss me off! I hate feeling like this, from the moment I wake up in the morning, I can feel this hideous rising bile, and I just want to rip heads off something! Anything really! Not fussy!
This being the case, you would think Hubby would have learned by now, and be particularly attentive to how his actions affect me this week…. you would think….
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